Here and now, on the turbo

The house is empty for one hour. It’s the perfect opportunity for a "sanity check" session on the bike trainer - also affectionately called “Turbo”. 15 minutes with a goal of at least 10 in zone 2, preferably at the end of the workday.

I usually don’t listen to anything, to be alone with the machine and my thoughts. Today is a treat. I pop in the earbuds and begin to listen to an old Ram Dass seminar. This is how the current version of myself is “having fun”. I would have never imagined this even a year ago. I’m cheap so YouTube is playing on my unlocked screen dangling in the bottle cage.

After 30min the main course is over. I'm caked in my own salt and grunting in the garage. The layers of salt are starting to show on the frame. Negligence is visible everywhere. The smashed dry raisins on the garage floor are the latest artifacts. The bike is squeaky. I’ve been putting off pumping up the tubes, it’s on the list. My hamstrings are stiff like the carbon frame, and my lower back tells me to fuck off. 40min on the timer - bozo wants more.

For some dark algorithmic reason, YouTube decides to play Baba O'Riley - the Who. The guitar reef gets me from the 70s into cardiac zone 5. I feel, warn, light, ecstatic. My lower body monopolizes all blood flow. The feeling of cosmic insignificance and magnificence of my existence strickes me. I ride it for a few minutes.

Heart rate goes back down and sweat keeps pooling. The brain recovering regular blood supply switches back to a typical overactive mode. Questions are piling up as the good vibes fade. Is the nature of this kind of experience physiological only? Or does it prove the theory that mind and body are the same machine? How much of this was influenced by years of fitness content? Cardio predispositions? Cycling enthusiasm? Equipment availability? The Apple Watch on my wrist? Orthorexia? Ram Dass... Is that the “here and now” he was talking about?

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