High St detour

I seized the opportunity to be out of the house without a child with me to do a detour to my local dispensary – I still smile at the term dispensary. What a typical euphemism camouflaging so much and saying just as much about our culture these days.

Nevertheless, I have been a consumer over the last few years. California has been good to me since I landed in the Bay in 2016. It took me 2 years to ingest my first edible due to stereotypically negative views on "drugs" from my upbringing.

My cannabis consumption pattern is very stable at one box of 20 per year. There is a gap of 6+ months each year because I get a noticeable dip in mood the day after consumption. For 12 hours I experience a torturous state where nothing I perceive is acceptable. A mild depression where even the banal things, like dropping a spoon in the sink or having to do an extra trip out to get the trash, is launching my post-THC brain into world-ending projections. That’s why I almost always have Sunday be my weed day, Mondays are gloomy anyway.

After a few weeks of enthusiastic attempts at reconciliation between benefits and mood cost I fall into a spiral of typical over-analysis that morphs quickly into quitting… until it has been long enough and renewed enthusiasm leads me back to the best shopping experience in town, on High St.

Marijuana seems to be a necessity for a lot to go through the reality of life. Parenting and stressful jobs are the main reasons I heard firsthand. It's been more than a way to take an edge off, it's coping. Ironically, now that it’s legal, many have been using it as a medication more than recreationally – A prime example of the insane necessities of our time. My worldview doesn't jive well with that. I’m very grateful to have been able to safely get to that realization and enjoy a few good high on the way. A long stretching session while high on a 5g 1:1 THC/CBD is as close as I’ve gotten to the oceanic feeling.

I’m writing this on one of the days after. The gloom is talking. Once again trying to reconcile my values and the reality of life. The new box is here in the cupboard...

← Index / Published on 2024-11-26